Rule change

One coffee event per day, per location. Being quite transitory this seems like a less egregious ruleset, he said sipping  on his first coffee. (At the office) But really the third of the day. Previous transgressions happened at 3am in the domicile of the Jo. Then at 7am in the vehicular transportation of the Jo. Then now at 9am at the office of the Jo.

The ten month old infant that my wife and I created decided 1am was a good time to start the day. She feels the need to impress upon her parents that, ‘Sleep is for the weak’. Her chances of getting a sibling are very much diminished at this point. Sometimes we wonder (when we can manage a brief moment lucidity) where she gets it from. We both love sleep.

This obviously puts a damper on Joeys ability to to coherently order his thoughts. *someone in the peanut gallery starts laughing*

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In case you were wondering… The lego is/has/continues to be bought for my daughter. Although I as custodian of said lego will continue to keep it safe for her until she comes of age. Also, I will continue to test said lego. Making sure all the pieces are present and accounted for, that all structures are up to code and that all lego trains are in a fully functioning condition. Yeah, that was plurality. Hamleys see me coming and they be like ka-ching, ka-ching, wakka, wakka, dance, dance. ‘We are eating today people!’ *balloons start to come down from the ceiling*

Other than lego my daughter owns some DBXW. Which is sitting in my portfolio at the moment. I’ve heard some arguments for accounts in the child’s own name and some arguments for a trust. In all honesty I’m not entirely sure how to tackle this problem yet. Bring your kids up right and they don’t blow all their money versus at eighteen kids are basically reckless n00bs and you’re much better off having a trust pay them pocket money. And then the ever sobering thought that if I die before all that then my cold dead corpse gets sodomised by the taxman first. Also Capital gains tax when I sell them. Neither inevitability appeals to me.

At one point I even thought, well let me just turn everything into Krugers and Morgans. And mail her the safety deposit key when she’s thirty. But then FNB happened. So fuck that. I have no idea. If anyone has any clever suggestions?

In terms of schooling. Tax free accounts happened more or less the same time my wife got knocked up. So we each got one. One very conservative. One medium-ish risk. Both seem to be fairing better than the DBXW at the moment, which has pretty much done nothing this past year. Whether or not we actually use these funds for education has yet to be determined. Alot depends on the finance minister upping the limits in the next couple of years and providing some clarity on how they’re gonna run this thing going forward. I have a sneaky suspicion they’re going to kick the can down the road again this year. But lets see.

Having kids is a serious mind-fuck, an improvised explosive device to your previous cushy lifestyle that took a careful decade to cultivate and nurture. ‘And like that… *snaps fingers* it was gone!’ (Usual suspects) If I had known how easily sex leads to children I would have been MUCH more circumspect in my youth. Monk like even.

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This is me, in Japan at the exact moment I found out I was about to be a dad. Me and my friend had just been to the Robot-restaurant (which is this insane robotic cabaret show… with giant pink bunny rabbits and… it’s a bit hard to explain). We were trundling around Shinjuku (Shinjuku is basically noise, brothels and Pachinko gambling dens) in a Japan-o-rama fueled haze when I got the ‘little bean’ sonar pic. This is the resulting phone call home.

People often ask me if I miss being a childless hedonist. It a weird question. You’re not really comparing apples with apples. That life is over. You had those experiences and they were nice. Now it’s a different experience. You can’t live your life just doing the same thing over and over. I think I might answer differently if I felt I hadn’t achieved all those things I wanted to in my early twenties and thirties. Not that I checked all the boxes… but I checked a lot of them. Now I have new ticky boxes and its exciting.

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